Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Gifts and the Gift of Giving

Herb Garden from "The Master Gardner"
Some people have the gift of gifts, or the ability to choose just the right thing for someone else.  I think it's genetic.  My adult children are thoughtful and through the years, I have received many special gifts from them.  My oldest son recently just amazed me with a mother's day gift -- a standing garden!  The note that arrived with the box of parts said, "No excuse for not having fresh herbs, Mom."  This is a 3 by 4 foot cedar herb garden which is off the ground which makes it easier to water and weed, and as the description says, easier on the back and the knees.  Also those cute little rabbits cannot reach the plants, but deer can.  We shall see.  I gave up on having roses because the deer would surgically clip the rose buds just before the roses bloomed.

I enjoy choosing just the right gift for others as well.  And I have more pleasure in giving the gift than receiving one.  But these days, the art of receiving gifts is gone.  No more thank you notes, not even an email.  The worst thing is having to ask the person if they received the gift.  Not good.  

I know, I know, how old fashioned; imagine actually writing a note, but even an email is fine with me these days.

Years ago, my eye doctor, who fitted me with contacts, actually wrote thank you notes for referrals.  He has since retired, but I still remember those hand-written notes.

Gifts can be for an event, such as one my husband and I received from my other son and daughter-in-law, tickets to a World War II ball.  We had so much fun.  There were hundreds of people at the ball, many dressed in costume.  The music was great, swing dancing, Frank Sinatra and the Andrew Sisters (impersonators of course), were there.

Looking back, I think the gift thing comes from your family.  My parents made my sister and me feel special by giving us gifts for our birthdays that did not cost very much, sometimes they were hand made, but always given with much love and thought.

One thing my dad would do is to send small gifts with little notes, especially to my son when he was little.  One year, after Christmas, I received a package from him in the mail. It took me a long time to open it, you see he had died two weeks before.  It was the last thing he did before he went into the hospital.

How do you feel about the "gift thing."?

16 comments:

  1. Love your herb box. As for saying thank you for gifts I am with you all the way. I gave one person a gift and wasn't sure they even knew it came from us, they sure never said thanks for it. I was taught always to say thank you and to write "bread and butter" letters to anyone who had invited us to stay or even to dinner. I love to give gifts and to receive them although money is a lot tighter these days. Do you know where your son got that from by the way? It would be ideal for our balcony

    JO ON FOOD, MY TRAVELS AND A SCENT OF CHOCOLATE

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    1. Thank you, Jo. I have planted it with herbs from our local super market. Brookstone.com is the place to order the table, click "organic gardening table." But, the directions for assembling are not good. My husband went online and finally was able to figure out how to put it together. He is an engineer by the way, and worked on the space program :)

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  2. heart-breaking that you got that last gift after he had died....... like a message from a ghost! just shows he was thinking of you even in the hospital.

    xxo
    MOV

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    1. MOV, It was a message in many ways. Thanks for your comment.

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  3. I like that herb garden, and I do grow herbs myself. A very nice gift.

    With all the short forms of communicating today, I wonder how many can still write a letter?

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    1. I think they can, DG, but do they? Perhaps someday there will be classes? I understand that if kids don't learn cursive writing, they cannot read cursive letters.

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  4. I am jealous that you have so many insightful and generous gift-givers in your family. The herb garden is a fantastic idea!

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    1. Thank you Karen, I will see how it grows. I am not a gardener, spent the first seven years of my life in New York City and as a teen in Colorado, was not interested. Always envy those who know what to do and live in those climates where everything grows.

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  5. Hi LoW .. two very thoughtful gifts .. and I do hope the deer don't nobble the herbs before you get a chance to use them!! Loved reading the post - so much to think about .. and I agree - very few 'thank yous' ... or letters written at any time ...

    The ball sounds so much fun ..and I bet you had such a lovely time ... then your Dad being so thoughtful - that must pull your heart strings when you think of that time and his last hours ... amazing man. No wonder your family have inherited your family's habit of giving so carefully ..

    Wonderful read .. cheers Hilary

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    1. Did not want to sound preachy, but now, even an email would do :). And I keep letters from special friends to re-read. Always appreciate your visits.

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  6. That's so lovely (the standing garden). Praying that you'll always be surrounded by your sons and daughters and continue to receive thoughtful gifts.

    It's so much fun when you gift something to someone you are close to. It's an exercise in self-lessness and empathy because for that moment, you are concentrating on how it is to be in their shoes and what they would like to receive. If only we were always thinking that way. I enjoy it so much more than when we are obliged to give gifts to acquaintances who we don't know much about (for social reasons).

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    1. Gifts are a challenge, but for that special person, it is even better to watch them open your gift.

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  7. i know what you mean--it does seem that thank-you notes are not big any longer---i enjoy writing a note or sending a card to people--and i adore shopping for just the right gift :)

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  8. Knowing how thoughtful you are through your blog, I know you are a good gift-giver, Lynn.

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  9. Loverofwords you are the world's best gift-giver and are really the best in the family! You always spend lots of time and thought and always come up with the most appropriate gift. I remember the time you sent me a whole "Cowgirl" outfit (and I think an Indian doll too) that must have taken one entire paycheck from your summer job in the mountains. Not too many teenagers would do that for a younger sibling. And you're so right about the thank you notes. It's rare today to get one.

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  10. Thanks, CQ, We sisters have to stick together.

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